The big girl shot
By martha
Hammered blonde: “It’sh my BIRTHDAY! I’m 24!!! Whooooooooooooo!. We want SHOTS! I want . . . I want . . . . I dunno what I want. What should we get? I want something that’sh, you know … for a 24-year-old! (Aside to friends: Whooooooooo!) Something hard-core. HARD-CORE. Like, a Jager Bomb. No — no Jager Bomb. Something that shays I’ve done all the OTHER shots. Those fruity 21-year-old and 22- and 23-year-old shots. I want something that, you know, says I’ve done it ALL. What should we get?
Me: Tequila.
You’re far, far nicer than I — I usually say “A cab. Because I’ve got to clean up the bathroom at the end of the night. Happy Birthday!”